People often ask me how much time is too much. Given that screens have become so pervasive in every place and aspect of our lives, I think that a better way to look at it is all the places and times you decide not to allow screens. Where in the house, in school, outside, might not be great places to have a screen, or at least a cell phone?
Here is one example of something I do: When we are having people over who have kids/teens, I let the guests know, beforehand, that we have a tech-away policy when socializing at our home. That little preamble has helped my kids feel less awkward when guests arrive, and the policy is gently brought up. I try to say something in a joking way like ”I am so glad we all get to share our attention, I know all of our devices will be shouting in the background ‘What about me, what about me?’”
Glennon Doyle, who writes on the merits of being honest and purposeful, posted this picture above on Facebook last week sharing with her fans that when her daughters’ friends come over, they have to deposit their phones in a basket.
When my daughter, Tessa, was younger and she had sleepovers, we would agree beforehand on a reasonable time for devices put away, usually around 11:30. She would tell her friends about the policy before arriving so I wouldn’t embarrass her. Because at 11:30 they would rarely shut off the devices on their own, I usually had to come in to collect them. I always got the sense that at least one or two of them were partly relieved when I put the devices to sleep.
Three years ago my family decided to make car time, screen-free time. There is no question that it has been a great thing for our car conversations. It was a bit touch-and-go when we started. When my kid’s friends would get in the car, I would gently tell them that we have a no cell phone policy in the car. At first, my kids were embarrassed that I would say this. But through our family conversations where we discussed the benefits of such a policy, over time they stopped being annoyed, and they don’t mind my telling their friends—seriously, they don't.
There are clear safety reasons why fewer distractions in the car are good. Distracted driving now causes more accidents than drinking. And yet it is not just about safety. In Australia, a recent survey conducted of a thousand families found that 95% of parents believe a car is a place where kids can open up, and the family can bond. Yet, the parents in the study reported that more than 75% of their children are often on a tablet, phone or other screens, while in the car.
It might be fun to share these cell phone free bans with your kids as a conversation starter: ** On the left side there is a vertical sharing bar and if you click on the printer icon you can print this TTT and bring to the dinner table or any other place you will talk with youth about the TTT.
For this week’s TTT talk to your family and youth about what are the times and places in their day where screens are not allowed:
We would love for you to share this TTT any way that works for you, whether that’s on social media or via a newsletter. If you want to send it out in your newsletter we just ask that you credit us and link to our website, and let us know at lisa@screenagersmovie.com.
HOST A SCREENING to help spark change.
FIND EVENT LISTINGS
Do you organize professional development in schools? We now have a 6-hour, 3-part training module. Request more information here Professional Development.
Stay in touch with the Screenagers community on Facebook, Twitter and leave comments below.
Here are 3 other TTTs you might be interested in:
Siblings and Screentime
When Kids Swear Online
Teens Build Communication Skills by Working
Here is a video from the Screenagers YouTube Channel that talks more about this subject
People often ask me how much time is too much. Given that screens have become so pervasive in every place and aspect of our lives, I think that a better way to look at it is all the places and times you decide not to allow screens. Where in the house, in school, outside, might not be great places to have a screen, or at least a cell phone?
Here is one example of something I do: When we are having people over who have kids/teens, I let the guests know, beforehand, that we have a tech-away policy when socializing at our home. That little preamble has helped my kids feel less awkward when guests arrive, and the policy is gently brought up. I try to say something in a joking way like ”I am so glad we all get to share our attention, I know all of our devices will be shouting in the background ‘What about me, what about me?’”
Glennon Doyle, who writes on the merits of being honest and purposeful, posted this picture above on Facebook last week sharing with her fans that when her daughters’ friends come over, they have to deposit their phones in a basket.
When my daughter, Tessa, was younger and she had sleepovers, we would agree beforehand on a reasonable time for devices put away, usually around 11:30. She would tell her friends about the policy before arriving so I wouldn’t embarrass her. Because at 11:30 they would rarely shut off the devices on their own, I usually had to come in to collect them. I always got the sense that at least one or two of them were partly relieved when I put the devices to sleep.
Three years ago my family decided to make car time, screen-free time. There is no question that it has been a great thing for our car conversations. It was a bit touch-and-go when we started. When my kid’s friends would get in the car, I would gently tell them that we have a no cell phone policy in the car. At first, my kids were embarrassed that I would say this. But through our family conversations where we discussed the benefits of such a policy, over time they stopped being annoyed, and they don’t mind my telling their friends—seriously, they don't.
There are clear safety reasons why fewer distractions in the car are good. Distracted driving now causes more accidents than drinking. And yet it is not just about safety. In Australia, a recent survey conducted of a thousand families found that 95% of parents believe a car is a place where kids can open up, and the family can bond. Yet, the parents in the study reported that more than 75% of their children are often on a tablet, phone or other screens, while in the car.
It might be fun to share these cell phone free bans with your kids as a conversation starter: ** On the left side there is a vertical sharing bar and if you click on the printer icon you can print this TTT and bring to the dinner table or any other place you will talk with youth about the TTT.
For this week’s TTT talk to your family and youth about what are the times and places in their day where screens are not allowed:
We would love for you to share this TTT any way that works for you, whether that’s on social media or via a newsletter. If you want to send it out in your newsletter we just ask that you credit us and link to our website, and let us know at lisa@screenagersmovie.com.
HOST A SCREENING to help spark change.
FIND EVENT LISTINGS
Do you organize professional development in schools? We now have a 6-hour, 3-part training module. Request more information here Professional Development.
Stay in touch with the Screenagers community on Facebook, Twitter and leave comments below.
Here are 3 other TTTs you might be interested in:
Siblings and Screentime
When Kids Swear Online
Teens Build Communication Skills by Working
Here is a video from the Screenagers YouTube Channel that talks more about this subject
In today’s blog, you’ll learn how Positive Discipline can transform your approach to parenting screen time. You’ll learn about this potentially transformative parenting technique from renowned Positive Discipline expert Casey O’Roarty. Learn to navigate challenges, foster connection, and empower your child’s self-regulation.
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I've noticed a lot of confusion in my conversations with adults and teens about using incognito mode. Many don't realize that, even in incognito mode, the websites they visit can still track their activity and show them ads related to what they did during that session. If you are unfamiliar with Incognito mode, today I explain why and how kids may use it and why you want to know.
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Today I share my top 3 main screen time categories and offer many options of rules that can be tailored to your specific family. Let’s be real that policies for a 10-year-old will be different for a 17-year-old. Then there are factors such as kid’s maturity levels, outside activities, sibling dynamics, bandwidth of parents/guardians, and the list goes on. For this reason, having many ideas can be helpful. Let’s get started.
READ MORE >for more like this, DR. DELANEY RUSTON'S NEW BOOK, PARENTING IN THE SCREEN AGE, IS THE DEFINITIVE GUIDE FOR TODAY’S PARENTS. WITH INSIGHTS ON SCREEN TIME FROM RESEARCHERS, INPUT FROM KIDS & TEENS, THIS BOOK IS PACKED WITH SOLUTIONS FOR HOW TO START AND SUSTAIN PRODUCTIVE FAMILY TALKS ABOUT TECHNOLOGY AND IT’S IMPACT ON OUR MENTAL WELLBEING.
