What do AI, substance use, and video gaming have in common? They all can tempt young people (and old people) to engage in sneaky behaviors. Kids can feel tempted to do shortcuts, workarounds, or cheat for various reasons, using and related to AI, substances, and video games. 

Perhaps they hate a subject in school and want to get the homework done but don’t actually want to do it…hmmm, how to avoid doing it? Maybe reading is painfully difficult due to something like dyslexia…hmmm. How to avoid doing it?

Perhaps a teen knows that their family has a rule that does not allow them to play a specific video game due to its violent and misogynistic storyline, such as with Grand Theft Auto. Yet the teen has many friends playing the game and want to be able to play. Hmmm… what to do? 

Maybe an 8th-grade boy is with a group of friends at lunch, and someone pulls out a vape pen and starts passing it around. Do they partake in this sneaky and illegal behavior? 

Today, I explore such temptations and offer three things to say to kids and teens that can help add a little more weight to the healthier side of their decision-making brains vs. the riskier/sneaker side. 

A.I. 

If you are like me, you have been consuming various articles and podcasts on the many ways we can think through AI’s earth-shattering new presence. Tristan Harris and Aza Raskin, from The Center For Humane Technology just released an enlightening podcast episode, Spotlight on AI: What Would It Take For This To Go Well?

For school work, in class, and at home, kids can turn to AI for so much. Given how easy it is to turn to AI tools like Bing or ChatGPT to look up ideas and facts, create sentences, and more, they are faced with deciding when to do the work versus choosing quick workarounds. 

I was helping my mom acquire a savings CD recently, and I asked ChatGPT to tell me the final amount of interest she would gain, given compounding interest over 12 months. I got the answer, and it even showed me the actual math steps. Great, but none of my math muscles contracted in the slightest.  

Substances

Many young people hit vapes to experience a reward from a long list of possibilities, such as fitting in with a group, a nicotine buzz, a sweet flavor (think pina colada flavor), or the rewarding feeling of getting away with something. 

Some teenagers try using things like alcohol and cannabis, possibly to try to cope with psychological pain. For example, in Screenagers Under The Influence, we hear the story of a girl named Jo, who started using cannabis due to depression. 

Other teens turn to alcohol as a “social lubricant,” hoping it will boost fun and connection. In addition, some teens like feeling older via drinking. 

Video games

Video gaming is another area where temptations arise. A kid might think: “Hmm, I think I will play late into the night — no one will catch me. Another may ponder,  “Shall I play violent video games that I am not allowed to?” And someone else may think to themselves, “Do I keep switching tabs to my video game while pretending to do schoolwork?”

3 Things to discuss with youth related to the temptations above

Growing up is a time full of temptations for workarounds and the likes. Here are three things I suggest broaching with youth today. 

1. Name the temptations. Discuss the temptations I wrote about above because when we are open about all these types of choices that exist, then we create a sense of unity and understanding rather than a divide between us.

These discussions work best when we can see things from their side. For instance, “I can only imagine how hard it is to stay on task with your history homework when so many things are pulling at you, like that influencer you like who has so many entertaining YouTube shorts.” 

Another thing a parent might say to their child is, “I’ve been thinking about the fact that, as a society, we could have decriminalized weed and stopped there. Instead, we decided to legalize it; therefore, there are countless ways to obtain it online and in the stores popping up all the time. I know for some people, weed is very reinforcing, and having it be ubiquitous creates many issues. What are your thoughts about this?”

2. “This is your life.” This is a phrase I use a lot with my kids and my teen patients. When I see their eyes light up, I know it’s an effective sentence. They all appreciate hearing that I truly understand this is their life. 

This is not to say we are condoning choices or that there are no rules or laws. Life, thank goodness, is full of rules and laws. But we are letting them know that, as humans, they will be making decisions about their lives all the time. 

A parent might say, “Gosh, I know how prevalent vaping is today in social situations. I know some people really like it. I feel for everyone who has to decide if, or how much, they want to use nicotine. It is your life, and you get to decide these things. It is, of course, illegal, and there are plenty of health issues with vaping. It is not what I hope you choose to do, yet it is your life, and these can be tricky decisions.” 

Regarding video games, a parent might say, “We have talked a lot about which video games are okay for you to play and why. That said, I know there will be situations in which you will be tempted to play prohibited games. This is your life. We are not here to control all your choices. We hope you will choose to follow the rules. We also want you to know that if temptations arise, like friends saying they will only come here if they can play a game we don’t have, let's talk about these situations.”

Our conversations with our kids about our concerns regarding certain video game content can have a positive effect, whether we set strict rules or not. A research study showed that when kids, including high schoolers, believe their parents disapprove of violent video games, they tend to choose less violent ones.

3. “It's your learning journey, and there will be times when taking shortcuts around school work may seem appealing.”  

Linking school work to learning is important, as well as instilling in them a sense of autonomy in this journey. 

Questions to get the conversation started:

1. Let's talk about the many ways all of us, kids and adults, might want to do shortcuts, cheats, etc.
2. When I, as a parent, say, “This is your life,” what is your reaction? When might this feel dismissive or unsupported, even though that is not the intention?”
3. You might say, “Given that we are early in the school year, what are you jazzed about for your learning journey? What things not so much? How will you use tools to benefit your learning, and what will be tempting to find workarounds for?”

(By the way, I used AI to generate the photo in this blog😊.)

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As well as our weekly blog, we publish videos like this one every week on the Screenagers YouTube channel