Parenting Resources

What is the right age to give your kids their own device?

Delaney Ruston, MD
Lisa Tabb smiling to camera (Screenagers Producer)
Lisa Tabb
January 10, 2017

TECH TALK TUESDAY #49:WHAT IS THE RIGHT AGE TO GIVE YOUR KIDS THEIR OWN DEVICE?

2 young children in prams with 2 women

Yesterday I was talking to a mom in San Francisco who saw Screenagers this fall and she told me that she was dissapointed that I gave Tessa a phone in the end. She had seen my struggle with the issue through the movie but was really hoping I wouldn't cave. This mom has a 14-year old and has been very resolute about not giving her daughter a phone. Her daughter takes the public bus around the city and walks all over town by herself but she doesn't have a phone. She asked me, "Why not just say 'no'?"

I've had this question from other parents and thought about this issue while I was making the film. This mom has seen the benefits of holding out on giving her daughter a phone. She told me she looks out the window on bus rides and she engages directly with her friends when she wants to connect. Her daughter recently was at a cafe and noticed everyone was looking down and then she told her mom that she was so happy that she had not given her a phone yet. However, the mom does wonder about the effects this rule has on her daughter’s social life. She knows she is missing out on group chats with the volleyball team and that she is left out of some social functions. The mom has had a lot of backlash from her daughter's friends parents who feel judged by her because they gave their children a phone.

My feeling is that it is great to hold off as long as possible, but the key is when, or if, you do decide to hand them their own device that you have successfully practiced setting limits. The other thing is that you have to weigh in on what the impact is of this battle -- how is it affecting your relationship with your child? During the tween and teen years it is developmentally appropriate for our kids to connect to a new tribe and many are deepening these relationships online.

I was fascinated by a new study that looked at kids from 0 to age 4 that found 75% of them own their own device such as an iPad, but 7% already own a cellphone.

This week for Tech Talk Tuesday let’s talk about what we think is a good age for kids to get a device. Even if they have a device this is a great conversation to help get them thinking about these issues.

  • What are the pros and cons of kids and teens having smartphones?
  • What age do you think a kid or teen should get their own smartphone? Tablet or computer?
  • What do you think about toddlers using an iPad or smartphone?

As well as our weekly blog, we publish videos like this one every week on the Screenagers YouTube channel

Join
443
others who have made the pledge!
Thank you for making the pledge!
Please try again
Book page button

Available now - Parenting in the Screen Age, from Screenagers filmmaker Delaney Ruston MD

Order Here
Find A screening Button

Find a Screening - Find a screening of our movies in your local community

Learn More

Screenagers Podcast - Join Screenagers filmmaker Delaney Ruston MD for the latest Podcast

Learn More
Book page button

Available now - Parenting in the Screen Age, from Screenagers filmmaker Delaney Ruston MD

Learn More
Host a Screening Button

Community Screenings - Learn more about hosting your own Screenagers community screening event!

Learn More
Parenting In The Screen Age Book Cover

Free Book Preview - Download a free preview of "Parenting In The Screen Age" by Delaney Ruston, MD

Learn More

Join Today - Members can screen and view our movies year-round, access new lesson plans, resources and much more!

Learn More
Screenagers Under The Influence Banner

Our New Movie - Learn more about the third movie in the Screenagers Trilogy

Learn More

The Screenagers YouTube Channel - Subscribe for new videos and content from our team weekly!

Learn More
Host a Screening Button

Community Screenings - Learn more about hosting your own Screenagers community screening event!

Learn More
Find A screening Button

Find a Screening - Find a screening of our movies in your local community

Learn More

Screenagers Podcast - Join Screenagers filmmaker Delaney Ruston MD for the latest Podcast

Learn More
Book page button

Available now - Parenting in the Screen Age, from Screenagers filmmaker Delaney Ruston MD

Learn More
Host a Screening Button

Community Screenings - Learn more about hosting your own Screenagers community screening event!

Learn More
Parenting In The Screen Age Book Cover

Free Book Preview - Download a free preview of "Parenting In The Screen Age" by Delaney Ruston, MD

Learn More

Join Today - Members can screen and view our movies year-round, access new lesson plans, resources and much more!

Learn More
Screenagers Under The Influence Banner

Our New Movie - Learn more about the third movie in the Screenagers Trilogy

Learn More

The Screenagers YouTube Channel - Subscribe for new videos and content from our team weekly!

Learn More
Book page button

Available now - Parenting in the Screen Age, from Screenagers filmmaker Delaney Ruston MD

Order Here
Find A screening Button

Find a Screening - Find a screening of our movies in your local community

Learn More

Screenagers Podcast - Join Screenagers filmmaker Delaney Ruston MD for the latest Podcast

Learn More
Book page button

Available now - Parenting in the Screen Age, from Screenagers filmmaker Delaney Ruston MD

Learn More
Host a Screening Button

Community Screenings - Learn more about hosting your own Screenagers community screening event!

Learn More
Parenting In The Screen Age Book Cover

Free Book Preview - Download a free preview of "Parenting In The Screen Age" by Delaney Ruston, MD

Learn More

Join Today - Members can screen and view our movies year-round, access new lesson plans, resources and much more!

Learn More
Screenagers Under The Influence Banner

Learn more about the third movie in the Screenagers movie series

Learn More

The Screenagers YouTube Channel - Subscribe for new videos and content from our team weekly!

Learn More

Screenagers: Elementary School Age Edition - Learn more about our latest movie.

Learn More

Learn more about the Screen-Free Sleep campaign at the website!

Visit Website
Host a Screening Button

Community Screenings - Learn more about hosting your own Screenagers community screening event!

Learn More
Find A screening Button

Find a Screening - Find a screening of our movies in your local community

Learn More

Screenagers Podcast - Join Screenagers filmmaker Delaney Ruston MD for the latest Podcast

Learn More
Book page button

Available now - Parenting in the Screen Age, from Screenagers filmmaker Delaney Ruston MD

Learn More
Host a Screening Button

Community Screenings - Learn more about hosting your own Screenagers community screening event!

Learn More
Parenting In The Screen Age Book Cover

Free Book Preview - Download a free preview of "Parenting In The Screen Age" by Delaney Ruston, MD

Learn More

Join Today - Members can screen and view our movies year-round, access new lesson plans, resources and much more!

Learn More
Screenagers Under The Influence Banner

Our New Movie - Learn more about the latest movie in the Screenagers Trilogy

Learn More

The Screenagers YouTube Channel - Subscribe for new videos and content from our team weekly!

Learn More

Screenagers: Elementary School Age Edition - Learn more about our latest movie.

Learn More

Learn more about the Screen-Free Sleep campaign at the website!

Visit Website
Parenting Resources

What is the right age to give your kids their own device?

Delaney Ruston, MD
January 10, 2017

TECH TALK TUESDAY #49:WHAT IS THE RIGHT AGE TO GIVE YOUR KIDS THEIR OWN DEVICE?

2 young children in prams with 2 women

Yesterday I was talking to a mom in San Francisco who saw Screenagers this fall and she told me that she was dissapointed that I gave Tessa a phone in the end. She had seen my struggle with the issue through the movie but was really hoping I wouldn't cave. This mom has a 14-year old and has been very resolute about not giving her daughter a phone. Her daughter takes the public bus around the city and walks all over town by herself but she doesn't have a phone. She asked me, "Why not just say 'no'?"

I've had this question from other parents and thought about this issue while I was making the film. This mom has seen the benefits of holding out on giving her daughter a phone. She told me she looks out the window on bus rides and she engages directly with her friends when she wants to connect. Her daughter recently was at a cafe and noticed everyone was looking down and then she told her mom that she was so happy that she had not given her a phone yet. However, the mom does wonder about the effects this rule has on her daughter’s social life. She knows she is missing out on group chats with the volleyball team and that she is left out of some social functions. The mom has had a lot of backlash from her daughter's friends parents who feel judged by her because they gave their children a phone.

My feeling is that it is great to hold off as long as possible, but the key is when, or if, you do decide to hand them their own device that you have successfully practiced setting limits. The other thing is that you have to weigh in on what the impact is of this battle -- how is it affecting your relationship with your child? During the tween and teen years it is developmentally appropriate for our kids to connect to a new tribe and many are deepening these relationships online.

I was fascinated by a new study that looked at kids from 0 to age 4 that found 75% of them own their own device such as an iPad, but 7% already own a cellphone.

This week for Tech Talk Tuesday let’s talk about what we think is a good age for kids to get a device. Even if they have a device this is a great conversation to help get them thinking about these issues.

  • What are the pros and cons of kids and teens having smartphones?
  • What age do you think a kid or teen should get their own smartphone? Tablet or computer?
  • What do you think about toddlers using an iPad or smartphone?

As well as our weekly blog, we publish videos like this one every week on the Screenagers YouTube channel

More Like This

4 Essential Tech Guides Every Parent Should Read
August 12, 2025
Parenting Resources

4 Essential Tech Guides Every Parent Should Read

Wow! Summer really goes by fast, doesn’t it? Back-to-school is already here for some and not far away for others. Ahead of this school year, I’ve hand-picked four of our most useful blogs. Practical, timely guides to help you set your family up for a healthier, more balanced relationship with technology in the months ahead.

READ MORE >
A Look Back: Our Six Most Read Blogs So Far in 2025
July 29, 2025
Parenting Resources

A Look Back: Our Six Most Read Blogs So Far in 2025

Today I’m rounding up six of the most-read blogs from 2025 so far. Stories and interviews that struck a chord with readers and offered real tools for parenting in the screen age. Whether you missed a few or want a quick refresher, I hope you’ll find something here that inspires a new conversation in your home, school, or community.

READ MORE >
Streaming, AirPods & Hearing Loss – Are You Listening Safely?
June 10, 2025
Parenting Resources

Streaming, AirPods & Hearing Loss – Are You Listening Safely?

Last week in clinic, I met with a teen and her mom. The mom voiced concern about her daughter using over-the-ear headphones for hours on end, worried it could be harming her hearing. Headphones and earbuds have become the norm, and for many of us, volume tends to creep up. I’ve caught myself lately at the gym, blasting music louder than I probably should. Today I talk more about this and highlight one thing you can do right now for yourself and with your family to check in on your hearing.

READ MORE >

parenting in the screen age

for more like this, DR. DELANEY RUSTON'S NEW BOOK, PARENTING IN THE SCREEN AGE, IS THE DEFINITIVE GUIDE FOR TODAY’S PARENTS. WITH INSIGHTS ON SCREEN TIME FROM RESEARCHERS, INPUT FROM KIDS & TEENS, THIS BOOK IS PACKED WITH SOLUTIONS FOR HOW TO START AND SUSTAIN PRODUCTIVE FAMILY TALKS ABOUT TECHNOLOGY AND IT’S IMPACT ON OUR MENTAL WELLBEING.  

ORDER HERE
Parenting in the Screen Age book cover