Teen psychologist Lisa Damour breaks down three manipulative tactics online games and apps use to push kids into spending: algorithms that time pitches to when kids are tired or bored, scarcity tactics like countdown timers that trigger impulse buys, and in-app currencies (gems, coins, tokens) designed to disguise real dollar costs. Research shows teens resist these tactics better once they understand them.
I recently reached out to the wonderful teen psychologist, Lisa Damour, to see if we could guest share her recent substack post titled “Helping Teens Understand Manipulative Online Marketing.” I am delighted to share it here today. (By the way, Lisa is in our upcoming film, Screenagers: Generation AI.)
In Damour’s intro to her article she wrote about the fact that many popular games and apps are designed to encourage kids to make purchases once they’re already hooked in, and how these moments can become important opportunities to teach our kids about manipulative marketing, digital spending, and becoming thoughtful consumers online.
One of the reasons I am such a fan of Lisa Damour’s work, including her many bestselling books, is that she offers actual phrases to try when talking with teens.
Conversation is psychology in action, and getting help with ways to create productive conversations, rather than tipping a teen into reactance, is incredibly valuable. You’ll see her do that throughout her writing below.
Here is her Substack article:
by Lisa Damour (republished here with permission - thank you Lisa!)
Here’s great news: Teenagers hate being tricked by adults, and research shows that they become more resistant to manipulative marketing tactics when they learn about them. To help your tween or teen raise their defenses against online sales schemes, here are points you might want to cover.
Every time we scroll, pause, like, or click, we are feeding an algorithm that is building an increasingly precise picture of who we are, what we want, and when we are most likely to splurge.
To talk about this with your teen, consider saying, “I know you already understand how the algorithm works—you probably know more about it than I do. But here’s what I’d add: These systems aren’t just tracking what you like; they’re also tracking your mood. They know when you’re bored, when you’ve been scrolling longer than usual, when you’re tired. And that’s when they show you things to buy. Paying attention to how sneaky these platforms are helps keep us from purchasing things we don’t really want or need.”
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Limited-time offers, countdown timers, and “only 3 left” alerts are all designed to trigger the same basic fear: that we are about to miss out on something we might want.
While the pressure is manufactured, the feeling it produces is not—and that’s exactly what drives impulse buying.
You might say: “Countdown timers and ‘limited time only’ offers are designed to make you act before you think. So here’s a simple rule: If it’s not something you were already planning to buy, it’s probably not something you should purchase just because it’s about to disappear.”
Some video games and social media platforms turn real dollars into gems, coins, or tokens, making it easy to overspend.
In games, kids are often urged to use abstract currency to buy “skins” and upgrades, and on platforms like TikTok, teens can use “coins” to give gifts to creators during live streams.
“Have you noticed how easy it is to spend gems or coins because they don’t feel like real money?” you might ask. “That’s no accident, and it’s one of the oldest tricks in the book. It’s one of the reasons casinos use chips. Before you spend anything—coins, gems, tokens, whatever—it’s smart to stop and calculate the actual dollar amount.
Taking that step almost always changes how the decision feels.”
Learn more about showing our movies in your school or community!
Join Screenagers filmmaker Delaney Ruston MD for our latest Podcast
Learn more about our Screen-Free Sleep campaign at the website!
Our movie made for parents and educators of younger kids
Join Screenagers filmmaker Delaney Ruston MD for our latest Podcast
Register your interest in bringing our new movie to your school or community
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I recently reached out to the wonderful teen psychologist, Lisa Damour, to see if we could guest share her recent substack post titled “Helping Teens Understand Manipulative Online Marketing.” I am delighted to share it here today. (By the way, Lisa is in our upcoming film, Screenagers: Generation AI.)
In Damour’s intro to her article she wrote about the fact that many popular games and apps are designed to encourage kids to make purchases once they’re already hooked in, and how these moments can become important opportunities to teach our kids about manipulative marketing, digital spending, and becoming thoughtful consumers online.
One of the reasons I am such a fan of Lisa Damour’s work, including her many bestselling books, is that she offers actual phrases to try when talking with teens.
Conversation is psychology in action, and getting help with ways to create productive conversations, rather than tipping a teen into reactance, is incredibly valuable. You’ll see her do that throughout her writing below.
Here is her Substack article:
by Lisa Damour (republished here with permission - thank you Lisa!)
Here’s great news: Teenagers hate being tricked by adults, and research shows that they become more resistant to manipulative marketing tactics when they learn about them. To help your tween or teen raise their defenses against online sales schemes, here are points you might want to cover.
Every time we scroll, pause, like, or click, we are feeding an algorithm that is building an increasingly precise picture of who we are, what we want, and when we are most likely to splurge.
To talk about this with your teen, consider saying, “I know you already understand how the algorithm works—you probably know more about it than I do. But here’s what I’d add: These systems aren’t just tracking what you like; they’re also tracking your mood. They know when you’re bored, when you’ve been scrolling longer than usual, when you’re tired. And that’s when they show you things to buy. Paying attention to how sneaky these platforms are helps keep us from purchasing things we don’t really want or need.”
Limited-time offers, countdown timers, and “only 3 left” alerts are all designed to trigger the same basic fear: that we are about to miss out on something we might want.
While the pressure is manufactured, the feeling it produces is not—and that’s exactly what drives impulse buying.
You might say: “Countdown timers and ‘limited time only’ offers are designed to make you act before you think. So here’s a simple rule: If it’s not something you were already planning to buy, it’s probably not something you should purchase just because it’s about to disappear.”
Some video games and social media platforms turn real dollars into gems, coins, or tokens, making it easy to overspend.
In games, kids are often urged to use abstract currency to buy “skins” and upgrades, and on platforms like TikTok, teens can use “coins” to give gifts to creators during live streams.
“Have you noticed how easy it is to spend gems or coins because they don’t feel like real money?” you might ask. “That’s no accident, and it’s one of the oldest tricks in the book. It’s one of the reasons casinos use chips. Before you spend anything—coins, gems, tokens, whatever—it’s smart to stop and calculate the actual dollar amount.
Taking that step almost always changes how the decision feels.”
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I recently reached out to the wonderful teen psychologist, Lisa Damour, to see if we could guest share her recent substack post titled “Helping Teens Understand Manipulative Online Marketing.” I am delighted to share it here today. (By the way, Lisa is in our upcoming film, Screenagers: Generation AI.)
In Damour’s intro to her article she wrote about the fact that many popular games and apps are designed to encourage kids to make purchases once they’re already hooked in, and how these moments can become important opportunities to teach our kids about manipulative marketing, digital spending, and becoming thoughtful consumers online.
One of the reasons I am such a fan of Lisa Damour’s work, including her many bestselling books, is that she offers actual phrases to try when talking with teens.
Conversation is psychology in action, and getting help with ways to create productive conversations, rather than tipping a teen into reactance, is incredibly valuable. You’ll see her do that throughout her writing below.
Here is her Substack article:
by Lisa Damour (republished here with permission - thank you Lisa!)
Here’s great news: Teenagers hate being tricked by adults, and research shows that they become more resistant to manipulative marketing tactics when they learn about them. To help your tween or teen raise their defenses against online sales schemes, here are points you might want to cover.
Every time we scroll, pause, like, or click, we are feeding an algorithm that is building an increasingly precise picture of who we are, what we want, and when we are most likely to splurge.
To talk about this with your teen, consider saying, “I know you already understand how the algorithm works—you probably know more about it than I do. But here’s what I’d add: These systems aren’t just tracking what you like; they’re also tracking your mood. They know when you’re bored, when you’ve been scrolling longer than usual, when you’re tired. And that’s when they show you things to buy. Paying attention to how sneaky these platforms are helps keep us from purchasing things we don’t really want or need.”
A Los Angeles jury has found Meta and YouTube liable for designing platforms that addicted a child and harmed her mental health, the first verdict of its kind. The case shifted the legal debate away from free speech and Section 230 protections toward platform design and its impact on young users. This is being called social media's "Big Tobacco moment," and it is one worth explaining to the kids in your life.
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Jared Cooney Horvath argues that the common defense of classroom technology — “there’s no definitive evidence of harm” — sets an unrealistic standard. Because ed tech evolves rapidly, product-specific causal trials are often impossible and ethically problematic. Instead, he points to converging evidence. In Utah, long-rising achievement scores reversed after digital tools became central in 2014, a pattern echoed in broader national and international data, raising concerns about large-scale tech adoption without clear evidence of benefit.
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Instagram’s new Teen Accounts are being promoted as safer for kids, but recent nationally representative data tells a more complicated story. This post invites families to take a research-based quiz together and have a calm, curiosity-driven conversation about what teens are actually experiencing on the platform — and what that means for trust, safety, and screen time.
READ MORE >for more like this, DR. DELANEY RUSTON'S NEW BOOK, PARENTING IN THE SCREEN AGE, IS THE DEFINITIVE GUIDE FOR TODAY’S PARENTS. WITH INSIGHTS ON SCREEN TIME FROM RESEARCHERS, INPUT FROM KIDS & TEENS, THIS BOOK IS PACKED WITH SOLUTIONS FOR HOW TO START AND SUSTAIN PRODUCTIVE FAMILY TALKS ABOUT TECHNOLOGY AND IT’S IMPACT ON OUR MENTAL WELLBEING.
